From Anthony:

We all have that one “guy” in our class. You know, the one who always arrives drunk. Physically there but not mentally. The type of people who show up to class still wearing the clothes that they partied in the night before. Beer stains on his shirt, possible vomit on shoes. Eyes blood shot red, not from the marijuana but the excess alcohol and lack of sleep. In his head he believes he is the master of the spoken english language. However, what comes out of his mouth is something only a foreign monster from Star Wars could relate to. They attempt to finish their work that’s due at the beginning class, at the beginning of class. Ten minutes into it they start to drift off into the oblivion. First comes the heavy head and the droopy eyes. Slowly but surely gravity takes over and they start drifting downwards. Instincts take over. The hand supports the head. Two minutes later the hand slips away, free from its masters tyranny, and the head slams into the desk. I write this from my laptop, in class. Everything written has been a direct result of what this kid to my right is doing. I say this with great pride,

Only in College…