From Anonymous:
My buddies and I were celebrating the end of the school year at his house with some cheap wine. “George” was all proud of himself because he bought the champagne with 12.5% instead of 12% alcohol for the same price. Anyways, we’re hanging out and these stupid chicks, they wouldn’t drink the champagne so I had to drink it for them. I got into a fight with my friend “Erik” when he came in the door, I randomly karate kicked and broke a lava lamp, and showed the other normal signs of someone obliviously drunk.
All of a sudden I get a phone call from this hot chick I had wanted to bone for the last three weeks so I am adamant on driving over there. My friends mention that there is a police checkpoint down the road so I’d better not risk it, but I don’t really give a fuck so I head out the door. On the way out I finished off the last bits of a bottle of champagne. My friends locked the door behind me as they shouted out claims to my stereo and other personal belongings in case I was in a fatal accident.
Long story short, I am driving along drunk as fuck and I hit a curb going like 40mph and got a flat tire. I kept driving pissed off and worried contemplating driving on the freeway anyway. People were yelling on the side of the road that I had a flat tire and sparks were coming off my rims or whatever. Eventually, I decided to turn off the road and park. I started to cry a little bit like a bitch I know and I called up the chick to tell her what happened. She came to my rescue and we fucked the rest of the night. The next day I found out I had stopped one block before the police checkpoint. I didn’t get a DUI and I got laid. God loves drunk drivers.
Only in College…
wow, i would buy a lottery ticket after that night
girls dig guys that cry?